Why leaders need to speak human
Lose the jargon and speak from the heart to build trust and relationships this year
I’ve written about this before. In fact it’s one of my pet subjects. So let’s dive into it again as we start the year with shiny new leadership intentions and goals.
Want to build trust and relationships as a leader? Then for the love of all of that is good in this world….
Speak human.
We are indoctrinated as emerging leaders to parrot the latest management jargon and to build complex “non-answers” to difficult questions. (As a Communications leader, i’ve been guilty of this in my time…)
But who does this serve? Does it help us as leaders reach and connect with the people that work for us and with us? Does it help us convince customers to trust us and buy from us? The answer is typically a resounding no.
Now, I don’t watch a lot of football. And I apologise in advance if you’re not a Liverpool fan. I’m not either, but that’s by the by.
But I was watching Match of the Day with my husband at the weekend and they interviewed Jurgen Klopp after Liverpool’s resounding defeat against Brighton.
I’m always struck by how clear and direct he is when being interviewed. Especially when it’s about failure.
No waffling away from the subject. No huge line of excuses or non-answers. He simply said something along the lines of:
“We weren’t good enough. We deserved to lose, and we must do better.”
Every leader can speak this way. If they choose.
Imagine if every leader spoke this way. If when holding a company Town Hall, your CEO spoke to you as a human being and not as a walking corporate dictionary.
If when faced with a difficult question, they answered it.
Let’s try this thought exercise…
Non-human interaction
Employee: “Will we be getting a bonus this year?”
CEO: “It’s important to first note that the economic headwinds we are facing are strong and that supply chain issues are impacting our operational strategy in certain vertical sectors. We also committed to new premises in 2022, which resulted in an over investment in fixed assets and which impacted our ability to generate ongoing profit from our existing infrastructure. In addition, we set out a long term path towards employee upskilling initiatives, including the latest employee voice survey, which required investment. Therefore, we are actively reviewing our bonus strategy for the year and seeking to balance that with our ongoing financial commitments.”
Employee: “So is that a yes or a no?”
CEO: (Turns to HR director / Finance Director) “Roger, I’ll let you take this one…”
Human interaction
Employee: “Will we be getting a bonus this year?”
CEO: “I’m afraid not. And I know that’s really difficult to hear. It’s not a reflection on your performance at all. However, we are not doing as well as we need to in certain markets. That’s down to some outside factors that are difficult to control, although we are coming up with solutions to these problems, and we want your input. But as a result, we generated less profit than we forecast. It’s also why we put some money into equipping you all with more skills, so that we can solve future problems and so that you can develop your expertise for the future. We’ve had to make some hard choices this year and I understand you may not agree with them all. But I will make sure we continue to listen to your concerns and act on your ideas, as well as always sharing what is going on in our business.”
Employee: “Ok thank you. I’m not happy about it, but appreciate you being straight with us.”
I know i’d much rather hear the second answer than the first in that situation. Even if it’s bad news. Give it to me first and explain what you/we can do about it.
Why is it so hard to speak human?
A lot of it comes down to fear. I know that when I was working in corporate environments, there was always push back on giving a straight answer to a difficult question, as leaders were afraid it would show weakness and expose strategic failing. And that as a leader, it would therefore reflect poorly on them.
Not so.
All organisations have ups and downs. Things go wrong even when the conditions were in place for them to go right. And leaders don’t have a straight line upwards trajectory for the whole of their career. Everyone fails. And the best leaders learn from that failure to make things even better for the future. Shout out to the excellent podcast “How To Fail with Elizabeth Day” that really digs into this.
What counts in leadership is:
Ability and capacity to lead well, even when (especially when) those outside factors are kicking your ass.
Ability to learn from failure and to use that insight to improve.
Empathy for others. And the willingness to speak to them like a human being.
I’d say you’d be amazed at how many leaders there are that don’t understand these three points, especially the last one. But you won’t be amazed. You’ll be nodding your head in acknowledgement and agreement. You may have been affected by poor leadership. Or you may be a leader determined to do it right and struggling to figure it out.
In the next issue, we’ll delve into why organisations still favour the “stiff upper lip” style of leadership speak (and leaders!) and what a better alternative may look like.
And finally…
My coaching prompt to you for the next two weeks is a little bit different:
“What’s an answer you are dreading being asked as a leader? And how would you answer it?”
Think of the most difficult question someone in your organisation could ask you. How would you answer it? How would your existing leaders answer it? Are there differences between the two?
Pay attention to any insight you glean from this exercise and use it to shape the feedback you give to your leaders and to shape your own interaction with others as a leader.
You can find me on LinkedIn, on Twitter and at my website: www.narrativepurpose.com where I offer communications consultancy and leadership coaching to individuals, organisations and creative agencies.
And please share this newsletter if you’ve enjoyed this and think someone you know might benefit too!
P.S. don’t hate me if you’re not a Liverpool fan.